Blog This Challenge 28: Secret Squirrel Stuff

Your Hidden or Unusual Talent...
Time to fess up!

Can you touch your nose with your tongue? Do you sing soprano? Are you a whizz with a budget or have a black belt in karate? Make a mean roast or have you received some form of public recognition for something real that your readers don't know about?

Blog This

 

You mean something I have not blabbed all over the interweb already? You like to make it hard for a girl, don't you. Let's see, you already know all about my roller derby ambitions.

 

You know I fake a mean feast. You know my reading tastes, be it the literary whore's trash or her slutty tease tastes. So I am a bit befuddled as to what secrets or hidden talents I have left to reveal. I mean, I do bake a mean roast, but I am the third generation of women in my family to do so and it is hardly a hidden talent. The queue rolls up the driveway when word gets out it's roast day...

You know all about my desire to write, you know I am good at organising fundraisers.

Oh, hang on a minute - I have it! I am the grand duchess of parties! You didn't know that, did you?

We have had many parties here over the years, ranging from small intimate gatherings to massive blockbusters. Every tiny detail meticulously planned. And each has been a wonderful success, in fact my friends complain I set the bar way beyond too high... I set it to impossible, or so they say.

Boy 1 and Boy 2 were allowed the grand celebration for turning five, then ten, next will be fifteen, then eighteen, and twenty-one. They can do their own from then on!
The five year old parties involved a jumping castle, pony rides and large numbers of friends. Oh, and a theme. Boy 1 was obsessed with Batman, Boy 2 dinosaurs. I even had dinosaur chocolates made to go with the dinosaur party bags, dinosaur cake, dinosaur balloons, dinosaur treats and toys - well, you get the picture.

By ten it had evolved into laser skirmish (Boy 1) and roller skating parties (Boy 2).

But our biggest party by far was our Halloween party three years ago. Seventy-eight people, of which thirty-six were children. We hired witches to entertain them and had the whole house transformed into Ghoul Hollow, but my favourite thing was an interactive skeleton which hung at the front door. He greeted guests with comments such as: "Nice mask, oh sorry that's your face!" or "I'd come in with you but I ain't got the guts."

Came close to similar numbers for my forty-fifth last year. Around sixty people packed the function room at the local pub. It was cheating in a way, as all I had to do was book the venue, choose and book the band, pick the food. And invite people. They did the rest. Danced my ass off all night.

"Am I ever gonna see you face again..."

We are planning another Halloween party next year. Think it may be even bigger than the 2006 event. Have started planning it now... gravestones on driveway: check; ghoulish webs, terrifying soundtrack: check; new batteries for my mate, the skeleton: check, check check! And that is only the stuff I am prepared to spill here. Make way for 2010's most horrifying, spine-chilling, incredibly fun event:

Halloween with a Madmother!

Mwahahahahahahaha...

 

So there you have it. My deep, dark secret none of you knew. And I am sorry but no, I am not available for private bookings. In fact, I'd rather you kept it a bit quiet. I mean, only a few hundred of my nearest and dearest have any idea about this hidden skill...