Blog Friends

Just had to jump on and say:

I just had the best day!

Finally managed to meet the lovely Jen from Jemikaan (and her gorgeous tribe - man, those two have three beautiful children). Sorry, no photos - I was too busy chatting and catching up. Pretty sad seeing as I even remembered to grab my Picsio prize camera (well, it is shock and waterproof after all).

But we were too busy talking, supervising kids, playing with kids, leading kids astray with bad adult behaviour... Okay, so that was mainly me.

But it was so good to meet her, and I must admit I felt like we'd known each other in person for years. Goes to show you yet again how well you get to know someone over the mighty web. As Big Boy said on the way home:

I seem to know the nicest cyber people!

Sitting here now, looking like a drowned rat but can't stop smiling...

Imaginary Friends (Or I See Unreal People)

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Most of us who write or contribute on internet forums and blogs will at some point or another make the ghastly mistake of mentioning something to irl (in real life) friends or family. The conversation may go like this:
Friend: "My friend told me that there is a new therapy for kids with ASD, you inject them with sheep's liver and it clings to the heavy metals and helps purge them from their bodies and will cure them."
MM: "Ah, yes I was discussing this with cybermom just yesterday."
Friend: "Cybermom? That is a cute nickname, do you know her from school?"
MM: "No, we are on a parenting site together, I've known her for a few years now. She is really clued into all the cutting edge developments with ASD. I tend to ask her about anything new I hear on the grapevine."
Friend: "Ooooh. One of your imaginary friends *cue condescending little laugh*. Not a real friend. I've always found people on the internet to be a little strange, don't you?"
MM: "No. Do you think I'm weird?"

*Crickets chirrup in the otherwise dead silence

or the longest conversational pause in history*

Friend makes lamo excuse and leaves, quickly.

I have discussed before how I have made some wonderful friends here in internet world. You may have read of the fantastic night I had a couple of months ago with a friend I had known or known of for several years but had never before spoken to or met in the flesh. She only lives a little away, and I would class her as a new but good friend. Since our initial foray (and after bumping into her at the local shopping centre once) we have now caught up a couple more times, the most recent being last weekend at a local winery. Who leads who astray I am not sure, but I do know we laugh a lot when we are together, and never have those awkward silences that sometimes litter conversations with new people in your life.

Yes, I am the old fat one on the left...

Personally, I think she looks pretty good for an imaginary friend, don't you?

I also have another friend of many years standing. We met irl for the first time in 2007. We have since kept in constant contact (she lives interstate, though I am working on changing that), and I would class her as a very close friend. So close we would happily take on her son for life, should she need us to do so. She has stayed with us, with her wonderful son, and we really click. Our thoughts on our boys, very close in age, and how the world treats them, is on a par. I must admit though, she is the more rational one in on-line arguments and tends to allow reason rather than emotion to flow in her posts. I hope she moves here as she wishes, and we can support each other on a constant physical basis, rather than emotional support over the miles (not to belittle how much it means to have this).

Then there was the amazing coincidence when I stumbled across an irl Mum at our little local school whose photo I recognised in a comment on a blog I follow. After much deliberation I approached her, and have begun to get to know her a little more each time our paths cross. She is a lovely person, and funnily, is a close friend of one of my close friends. Her busy life has taken her away from blog world for a while, but I am hoping it is not for too much longer.

 *Hi Waffler! You are missed!*

And of course I now add the wonderful Ro onto this crossover list. Although she too is many miles away, I can see this long-distance friendship will evolve over phone lines, and hopefully into face to face in the not too distant future.

In  fact, you know what? I think it is my internet connections who have gotten me through the dark days, it is my on-line friends who are my safe haven, the place where I come when life is too damn hard, and my stupid pride won't allow me to let others in. It is you bunch of people commenting, cyberholding my hand, and invisibly patting me on the back as I brokenly spill my guts, who pull me back from the brink time after time. 

So, to all those nay-sayers who think these are not real friendships. You are right. Seriously, you are.

These are unreal friendships! The best there is.

Sometimes It Just Turns into One of *Those* Nights...

So it was off. We were trying to pin down another date with little success. Out of the original five only three could make it, and as we three were driving long distances to get there it all became too hard.

But two of us lived not far apart. Hesitantly (shy little flower I am) I suggested dinner, as free nights are pretty rare and hard to arrange in the Madmother house. Falteringly, she agreed. We had never met face to face.

Oh my Lord! What a night. Started at the local Mexican Restaurant for dinner, moved on to a Radiators gig at a local pub, ended with an hour of laughing our heads off talking in front of her place.

I feel I have a new friend, a real life friend. We talked. A lot. We both do talk a lot. We laughed, oh my we laughed all night! I think we share a similar warped sense of humour, and think fast on our feet.

I left home at 6pm, I returned at 3am.


Sometimes the nights where everything appears to go wrong can end up so right.

Today I Feel... Average.

Yeah, not firing on all six cylinders yet as I hoped I may be. Spluttering along on about three or four would be my guess in between nose-blowing and sneezes. Will have to refrain from any air kisses or hugs tonight, don't think this cold is at its most contagious but I certainly do NOT want to share the love around. Think they'd be peeved if I wore a surgical mask in the car? (I am one of the designated drivers tonight, still on my alcohol break which is a blessing with the way I am feeling with this damn head cold...)

It may be a good thing I am not in top form. Meeting new people (even if you feel you have known them for yonks) is always a bit tricky. People's perceptions from online personas can be, well... off base. And let's face it, even without alcohol I can be like Tigger on speed when I am at my finest.

Yeah, scary. I have been known to reduce grown men to tears when my razor wit is fully sharpened. In my heyday I could reduce them to sobbing wrecks via other means, but that is a blog revelation for another day.

I am really looking forward to meeting this group tonight. After many years of interacting on the interweb I must admit I am curious to see if my mental images are accurate.

The first time I met another friend I was surprised at how quiet she was. A little stunned actually, as she was so forthright and outspoken online. Don't get me wrong, I liked her, but had to adjust my ideas. Then came the next time we met when she stayed here and we got to know each other a lot better. My web impressions had been spot on, she was merely reserved upon our earlier meeting, and her verve was revealed in full force once we knew each other a little better. Hell, I was nervous at that initial get together, my first experience of web crossing into life. I would now class her as one of my closest friends.

It is a little surreal, this cross-over. You know intimate details of other's lives, have been through incredibly heart-wrenching crisis and hard times, have supported each other in times of inconceivable pain and need and yet have never met? Bound to be a little stilted at first, when there is so much pressure.

But if tonight goes as well as I suspect, it could be the first of many new catch ups. Not only from forums, as this one is, but from all web worlds. Bloggers, twitterers, hell the possibilities are endless!

Blog parties may well be this decade's new version of block parties. Like-minded people sharing interests and life experiences, what better basis for friendship is there?

After all, you can never have too many friends.

Blogger Etiquette or It's a Small World

I have a dilemma. One I did not expect at all. Reading through another blog I follow, a familiar face peered back at me from the comments trail. Not someone I know well, but another mother from the little school the boys attend. Now, I don't know if you are aware, but I live in a smallish rural area where everyone says Hi and gossip and tattles flow endlessly. It is the proverbial breeding ground for chinese whispers and rumour.

Of course I followed her profile link to her blog, well I wasn't totally sure my eyes weren't playing tricks on me. I just HAD to check it out. So I did. Reading her posts soon had me giggling out loud, she has a great writing style and is a pleasure to read. Oh, and the art! Wow!

 Yes, by now you have worked out, it is her. A Mum I see school-daily, say hello, smile, sometimes chat. We even share a mutual good friend.

To make matters worse (serves me right for snooping), I find we have quite an overlap of followers and blogs we both follow. Now I am wondering has she spotted me? Does she read my blog? How much have I spilled/blogged/vented on here uncensored that she may read and know those involved? I worry I have spilled too much.

But my real problem is this. I really like her blog, in fact I am amazed at how multi-talented this acquaintance is. If it was a stranger I'd be linking and commenting without hesitation, but because I know her... Well, I have chosen to follow anonymously for the first time in my blogging life. I have to ponder on this, it may be too invasive if I approach her, she may not want people irl to know of her blog. I know I have only linked a very select few of my friends myself.

So my question to you all is:
How would you feel if you were this blogger and I let you know I had discovered your blog? Would you feel stalked? Freak out?

I have considered if the roles reversed, and honestly do not mind if people contact me. If I wanted to remain faceless and anonymous I would not have posted the content of some of my blogs, nor the photos. I own what I write, just as in life I own what I say.

Oh, and if you are reading this having stumbled over me as I did you, just come and say hello.