Envy is my Middle Name...

I have had a few requests for me to post this piece since I linked Judith's Room back in this post. I didn't realise at the time that you need to be a member to read the blogs. And so here is my entry for the blogging theme ENVY.

Envy is my Middle Name...

I want him. I want him so much my palms sweat at the mention of his name. I tingle in anticipation when I know he is meeting HER because I will see him once more. He is coming again tonight as if he cannot get enough of her. But she is dirty, tainted. The things she allows him to do are not pure and loving like that he would share with me. Oh, if only he could see me I know he would never cast a second glance her way, but she will never allow that. Life is so unfair. I am sure she is taunting me, flashing me limited glimpses of their unbridled lust. I have never known a man's touch, SHE would not permit it. I think I have been saving myself for him, he is special. I am sure he is THE ONE.

 

Was that the door? Is he here already? The night has passed so quickly as I dreamt of him, of us. Oh, he is here, I must see him, I must! This time she will not have him for he is mine! What is she doing? Why is she holding that knife? I must have spoken aloud, she has heard me, she knows I want him. No, you must not, not again - YOU always spoil it for me, ALWAYS! The blood, so much blood and his beautiful eyes finally meet mine, but her image is the last he has seen. Why does it always end so? Am I destined to never be free? Why me, why not HER? Why can she not have a turn trapped inside this shell, shoved aside, locked deep within unable to break free? Why does she always get the chance to be with them when all I can do is grab shattered glimpses of life and love. One day I will escape, and she will be trapped within this one body we share.

I want him. I really want him. This time I am positive he is THE ONE. He is coming tonight, desperate to taste her tainted lips...